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Nienna

by Abbi Rajasekhar

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1.
Hello Beloved, I've come home Not good to be so all alone Sorry I've been away so long I've seen a lot since I've been gone I saw myself in the ocean Think I might have seen God in the ocean Never felt so incredibly human Never felt so incredibly small I learned a thing or two about power Became proud of my beating heart This heroic human heart endures Much more than we often give it credit for Oh Beloved, it's the heart that knows Things that we can't explain. This heroic human heart... Hello Beloved, I've come now There's seed to plant and fields to plow If you've got strength to share somehow I'll take as much as you'll allow I faced an inferno of fire Or maybe that was all in my head Fire makes me think about endings Fire makes me contemplate death Tossed my philosophy books in the fire Became proud of my beating heart This heroic human heart endures Much more than we often give it credit for Oh Beloved, it's the heart that knows Things that we can't explain This heroic human heart... Hello Beloved, let's come clean Remember everything we've seen We're lit with fire from within To begin, and begin, and begin, and begin
2.
When winter lasted for 1000 years We thought it would be the end for us We gathered wisdom for 1000 years And nobody loves summer like us When you've stood on the ledge Looked over the edge, you know Shapes in the dark, never too far below When you've stood on the ledge Looked over the edge, you know Things that you wish you didn't know And so we lean into the light And so we lean into the light And so we lean into the light And we lift up our eyes. When nighttime lasted for 1000 years We almost forgot about the sun We survived nighttime for 1000 years And nobody loves morning like us When you got to the end But you weren't dead, you know You could just shut your eyes Lay down and die, let go When we got to the end But we weren't dead, we put up a fight Oh, a hell of a fight And so we lean into the light And so we lean into the light And so we lean into the light And we lift up our eyes. And so we lean into the light And so we lean into the light And so we lean into the light And we lift up our eyes. When you get up again Face in the wind, you know So much more Than before
3.
Nienna 05:29
Once there was a void Then the void was filled with music And the sky was filled with light Every garden filled with life The most beautiful of all Were the Children who lived there They could do wonderful things Or create such suffering The earth groans in birth Oceans churn in the deep The Children struggle in the sun In the garden, She weeps All the beauty and ugliness that I've known It's all wrapped up inside of this little moment Anything can be turned around and used for good Anything can be overcome as we endure How is hope rekindled? Where is wisdom found? Where does grief turn into strength? In the garden, on the ground The deepest knowledge we have The instinct in our veins Survive the night and meet the day Resurrection for the brave All the pain and the brokenness gather up in the clouds All the tears will rain down on the fields where we live Trees of wisdom and gentleness, flowers of hope Will grow up from the ground in the fields where we live All the pain and the brokenness gather up in the clouds All the tears will rain down on the fields where we live Trees of wisdom and gentleness, flowers of hope Will grow up from the ground in the fields where we live All the pain and the brokenness gather up in the clouds All the tears will rain down on the fields where we live Trees of wisdom and gentleness, flowers of hope Will grow up from the ground in the fields where we live
4.
You Want Me 04:33
Never mind what I said last time I got catcallers in my head I'm working on my faith in you Believing what you said You want me You want me You want me You want Me Healing feels like burning sometimes You're good medicine Healing feels like burning sometimes You set me on fire You want me You want me You want me You want Me You don't know what you're doing to me Didn't know it could be so easy You don't know how you're setting me free Do you know that you're setting me free? You want me You want me You want me You want Me You want me You want me You want me You want Me

about

A little ‘Nienna’ backstory, if you’re interested…

Nienna is the name of a character from Tolkein’s Silmarillion, one of my all time favorite books. There are only a few paragraphs about her in the entire book.

She is one of the most powerful god’s who created the world. The other god’s are recognizable archetypes from various mythologies: Manwë “Lord of the Air”, Varda “Queen of Light”, Ulmo “Lord of Water” etc… but Nienna is the “Lady of Grief”. Since Tolkein made Nienna one of the most powerful beings on earth, I had to assume he actually believed that grief was one of the most powerful forces on earth, and this captivated my imagination.

Nienna lives alone in a garden at the edge of the world. She feels and focuses on all of the pain and brokenness of the people on earth - The Children. She grieves and she weeps. But, her tears are not in vain, they aren't just for the sake of suffering. Her tears are important. Nienna's tears fall onto the earth, and from them- hope, wisdom, endurance, and gentleness grow up into our world.

This, to me, was beautiful, and worth writing about.

So, this record sits in these themes: sorrow turning into strength, grief as catalyst for hope, wearing endurance and gentleness as armor. These songs mean a lot to me and I hope they are a blessing to your ears and your heart.

credits

released July 28, 2020

All music composition, arrangements, and lyrics, as well as lead vocals and multiple instrumental performances, by Abbi Rajasekhar.

Producer / Engineer/ Mix - Bryan Bachman
Engineer (Strings) - Brok Mende
Engineer (Auxiliary Sessions) - Jordan Wankel
Master - Colin Althaus

Featured Vocalists - Rebecca Rajasekhar & Charity Luce Colon

Featured Instrumentalists -
Violin - Elizabeth Caddy
Cello - Katelyn Cohen
Double Bass - Jake Gordon
Electric Guitar - Chase Carson
Bass - Joe Brown
Drums- PJ Pence

Gang Vocals: Bryan Bachman, Will Newton, Dustin Hoke, Grant Garland

Album Art: Anthony Barlich

Record Label: New Sphere Collective

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Abbi Rajasekhar Chicago, Illinois

Singer . Songwriter . Composer . Arranger . Lover . Fighter .

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